Thursday, July 19, 2012

Registry Woes & Prepping (or lack thereof) for a Baby

Ok, I know this sounds crazy because there are so many more important things to worry about and many more things to be happy about, but no matter what I do, I cannot seem to shake the registry worry.  In sum, I am super overwhelmed, nervous, and unsure about the whole idea of what I need to buy/register for, for Baby B.  The concept seems so daunting! What on earth does a baby need?  What are the right products to get?  What are the right brands?  Will the baby like it?  Which lists do I use?  Where do I even start?

I have seen a ton of shopping lists online and in books on what to buy.  I have heard and am heeding the warnings of not going overboard.  But it has not really calmed my nerves to be completely honest.  With every product, there is another major question.  Let's just take a stroller for instance.  Something I know I will need.  Then comes the question of what type of stroller - well I know I eventually want a jogging stroller (clearly!) but not only will there be less jogging/running when Baby B is due in November, but if I understand the "baby rules" correctly, I need a stroller that can fully recline, which jogging strollers do not.  So then we are back to the drawing board on what stroller to get - what will be the safest, easiest to use, most affordable, and make Baby B the happiest.  And once I figure this out, I need to go ahead and incorporate whether or not I want the stroller where the infant carrier can strap into the stroller and as an added bonus could potentially double as a carrier that locks in and becomes a car seat.   And don't even get me started on diapers or baby wipes - what wipes? What brand? Should I order them on I always use commercial wipes or go for homemade sometimes?

Don't get me wrong.  I feel soooo happy to have this "problem."  And even more excited to dig right in and get started.  My theory right now is that I really want to get some major registry shopping done in the next few weeks in anticipation that I might not be 100% during the third trimester.  There is also another added wrinkle that might be causing me a little stress.  You see, Judaism has a tradition/superstition (whatever you want to call it) where in you don't really prepare for a baby.  By this I mean, you do not buy baby items and set up the nursery pre-baby and you don't have a shower pre-baby.  From what I understand, it is bad luck and you hear many awful stories about families who had a pre-baby shower and then the worst happened.  Now many people choose to have showers and fully set up the room and things are fine.  I am not saying one way is right or wrong. But generally a Jewish tradition is to wait.  The custom, I believe, actually was meant  to make it easier on a family who suffered a loss - so not have to come from the hospital after experiencing the worst thing imaginable and have all the baby stuff to return/pack up.

Now, even though it is well intentioned, you can see how this can cause much angst.  To do nothing?!? Have nothing ready?! You can't even leave the hospital without a properly installed car seat.  The first few days are hard enough let alone the idea of now shopping for all those items you need!  Can't you just see the stress mounting?  So like anything, there are loopholes that people have developed through the years.  Some people will register/buy items and have stores hold them until the time comes or store them at someone else's home. Others will wait as long as possible and then in the last weeks set everything up, still others will do the bare minimum (car seat, change of clothes, bassinet etc.).  Oh and don't worry there can still be baby showers, just post baby!

Very Hungry Caterpillar Showers are the coolest 

Aaron and I are still trying to figure out exactly what we are going to do. We do know that we are going to register/buy stuff beforehand.  In fact, my dad came to visit this weekend and made me a very happy mommy-to-be with a very generous gift...

Crib, changing table, and dresser.  Thanks Dad!

But what we will bring into the house and where we will store things is up in the air. On the one hand, we feel the need to set up as much as possible (for the obvious reasons) as well as to get Wubby accustomed to the new things first before the baby is born, but on the other hand I am pretty neurotic and superstitious these days.  We have actually received a gift or two already, which happens and is totally completely fine (and is a loophole in my book because they did not know and were just being super kind and generous). For those gifts, I just put them in our office and closed the door, kind of ignoring them for now.  Also, for right now, the new furniture will stay at the store as long as we need it to, which will probably be post birth, but who knows.  As for other things, I think we will plan to leave them at an unsuspecting relatives and then when we are in the hospital, have our family help bring things over or maybe we will set things up just a few weeks before.  Honestly I am still not 100% sure...and

Phew, as you can see there is a lot to consider...

How did you handle the registry/baby shopping as well as pre- or post baby set up?

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