Saturday, April 21, 2012

5 Miles Proud!

Hi all.  Remember me?  I am not sure if anyone is still out there reading but for once in the past few weeks (because its been a while if you have not noticed)  I actually feel like posting so I figured what the hell as I sit here and do some much needed icing after a 5 mile run that I might actually do something that I consider "normal" for a change.  So more on where I have been and where I am going at a later date but for now, for once, lets actually talk about running because I did actually start this blog as, shocker, a running blog.

Lately, running and I have changed our relationship yet again.  I have been slowing down and relaxing my running with good intentions for a while.  But while they might have been good intentions,  it was hard to accept.  Hard to watch my times get slower, hard to see my "running dreams" slip away even in place of newer more exciting ones.  But over the past couple of months, something has happened - acceptance.  Something I thought I would never be able to do and has become easy and almost a way of life for me.  The Stephanie from a few months ago did not understand life without fast pace running, lengthly long runs,  and clear running goals.  It would not have made sense to her not to get up and work up a sweat and make sure to check off all her training plans.

I was a very very serious running

But as time as passed and as my body has pretty much made me slow down,  change has come and finally acceptance has come too.  I never thought I would feel this way but I am totally O.K. with what running has come to mean for me these days - which is honestly not much.  I try to get in about 5 workouts a week but they are just what they are and most are not running.  I get my body moving, I do what I feel and what I want and it is SLOW (for the Stephanie in the past anyway).  And that is totally and completely fine with me.  In fact, sometimes I can't even comprehend the need to run a race or push past a goal (I know shocker).  Maybe it is because things are changing, priorities are different, I am different, but for right now it is what it is and that is O.K.

I truly believe that when you are a runner you are in a relationship with running (go with me on this one, o.k?)  and that relationship can and do go through cycles.  For the first time in my life, running is not the center of my attention.  I am  running when I can, when I want, and how I want to and unbeknownst to me I have actually come to enjoy that freedom.  For once in my life I am not looking to get faster, race harder, and exercise more.  Instead, I am just being, well, sort of "normal" I guess.

Which brings me to today.  Aaron had to run 5 miles.  I wanted to run and felt like I could, so I tagged along.  I did not know if 5 miles was in the books for me - its been over a month since I have run that many miles at once (which seems totally crazy).  We set out.  I found my stride.  It felt good, enjoyable, doable.  And it just so happens that I ran the whole 5 miles.  It took me 52 minutes and it was not easy.  To say my running has changed is probably an understatement.  Last year, at this time 5 miles took me 37 minutes and if it took me 52 minutes to run 5 miles I might have had a nervous breakdown about it.  But not today, today I am proud of those miles.  Happy that I accomplished them and excited to see what is next.  Will I run again this week? Maybe.  I don't know.  But I will do what I can and be proud, happy, and content with that.

Ok not the best picture but I did just run 5miles..

Ok here is a better one when I am actually showered, you know. Oh I cut the hair...finally!

Well, now that I have rambled enough for everyone might as well leave you with a cute picture so that this post is not a total wash right?


Been missing everyone, tell me how you have been?!?


  1. Hi there. Glad you enjoyed the run. Love the pics - you look great and Wubby is adorable.

  2. Really glad to be reading this!!! Thinking of you often and even tried to catch you on chat the other day. You sound like you are doing really well :)